Stitch by Stitch

On April 23, 2014 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary, Knitting/Crocheting

I learned (or relearned) how to crochet about 6 years ago and then learned how to knit about 5 years ago. Looking back, I think that this may have been an unconscious step on the journey that I am now consciously undertaking. For myself, there is something deeply feminine and purifying about making something beautiful with my own hands. Knitting and crocheting have also taught me some valuable lessons.

One of the more important lessons that I have learned from yarncrafting is patience. Everything that can be created in this fashion must be created one stitch at a time. There is really no other way to do it. Even something easy like a basic dishcloth takes several hours. Making something larger can take weeks, months, or even longer. There is no real way to rush it along. My fingers will only move so fast. The project will take as long as it takes. Eventually, though, if I keep working on it, the project will get finished…one stitch at a time.

On the other hand, even though I can not rush the project along, it will only get completed if I keep working on it. To my chagrin, I have many abandoned projects and yarn that I have purchased for projects I have never started, which are cluttering up my back porch. One question I have often been asked by people is how long a project takes. That is a really hard question to answer. Only the very easiest projects can be completed in one sitting. Most projects involve working on it in snatches of time over a much longer period. While some of it depends on the difficulty and size of the project, but some of it also depends on how many snatches of time one devotes to it.

The nice thing is, though, that even though projects can not be complete unless one is actively working on them, one can start again at any time. I just started a sweater. I purchased the yarn for the project a few years ago, and I had chosen the pattern. I just never started it. Yet, when I decided to start it, the yarn and the pattern were all ready for me. So, I have finally begun the project, to be completed stitch by stitch!

SAMSUNG

There are so many things in life like that. I am finding that to be the case in reclaiming my hestia. There are so many projects that need to get done, and it can be really overwhelming! If I think about all the things I have to do, I will go hide in my room and not do a thing. Yet, if I slow down and work on my projects, stitch by stitch, they will eventually get completed.

There are several task management programs out there. When I had my business, I used to use Microsoft Outlook. Now, I am using a program called Toodledo, which is a free, cloud based program. The nice thing about it is that I can set up tasks to repeat themselves daily, weekly, monthly, or whatever interval is right. When I have large projects to do, I have started to make those projects daily repeating tasks. Each day, I try to work on a least a little bit, even if it is just 5 or 10 minutes.

It may seem like only working 5 or 10 minutes a day on something would not accomplish much, especially when one has a big project. Often though, I find that once I get started, I spend more time than that each day, and even if I do not…the project still gets done faster that way than if I am not working on it at all! Last fall, I managed to finish the project of cleaning the closet in this manner. This spring, I am tackling the project of cleaning the back porch!

Oh yes, and it by starting the project of cleaning the back porch, that I found the yarn for the sweater I had planned several years ago! I wonder which will get finished first, the back porch or the sweater?

Cleaning the Closet

On November 17, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary2 Comments

It has taken me a few weeks, but I have finally finished the project of cleaning and organizing our closet. The way the house is set up, we only have one closet, but it is a rather large walk-in closet. While walk-in closets are wonderful, there is a temptation to start just throwing things in the closet, and a temptation that we have and do succumb to. When this happens, a walk-in closet can be a frightening place that harbors closet monsters. Closet monsters hold one’s clothes hostage out of fear of opening the closet door and letting the monster out. Or if one braves the closet, one must run the risk of injury when walking in as the monster grabs one’s feet and ankles!

Anyways, I finally summoned up the courage to take on the closet monster. Rather than trying to tackle it all at once, I tried to do a least a little each day, and I did manage to do some on most days. I am finding this an effective way to manage larger projects. While I might get overwhelmed when I think of doing the entire closet, I find I can manage to muster the courage for small tasks. Eventually, the small tasks come together, and one can see the end in sight. At this point, I find that I start to have renewed energy, and then one day, I decide to just finish the task!

As a part of this project, I had to sort through my clothing. Over the past couple of years, I have begun the process of changing how I dressed. I am now to the point where I only wear dresses and skirts, and I no longer wear pants. It took me a while, because I had to acquire enough dresses and skirts to manage. We do not have much in the way of money right now, so I had to acquire these things slowly. Happily, we have a plus size resale/consignment shop near our house, so this has made things a little more affordable. Actually, aside from the affordability, I am finding it easier to find clothing in the style I am working towards at resale stores than I can at other stores. The newer clothing often seems rather poorly made, in addition to the styles being rather unpleasant. Some day, I hope to lose enough weight to fit into clothing at regular resale or antique stores, but for today, this store has been quite a blessing.

While I have been slowly acquiring skirts and dresses, I still had kept my pants. I wondered if I might want to go back to them, so I did not want to cross the Rubicon just yet. With the closet project underway, it was now time. So, I took the plunge, and I removed the clothing I no longer wore from my closet! In the midst of this, I also went through my dresser drawers and culled them in a similar fashion. I took several bags to the Salvation Army dropbox, and I took the nicer clothing to the resale/consignment shop I talked about above to sell. There are a few stray items that need to be ironed before they can go, but that is in process as well.

So, now I have a nice clean and organized closet, which I am rather excited about. I can now retrieve my clothing without having to risk injury or invasion from the closet monster, and I have a place for my winter boots.

Maybe this will give me the courage for one of my next projects…tackling the much bigger and nastier back porch monster!

Ganbatte Kudasai!

On November 9, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Japanese, Ponderings and Reflections2 Comments

I have been studying Japanese lately, and I am finding Japanese a very interesting language in many ways. One of the things that is so interesting is that there are words for concepts that are not expressed easily in English. One of these words is ganbaru, which roughly translates to “doing one’s best” or “hard work.”

One of the things that is quite interesting is that in Japanese the phrase, “Ganbatte kudasai!” is used in a similar context that the phrase “Good luck!” would be used in English, and is said when someone is about to undertake a difficult task or some other endeavor. The rough translation of “Ganbatte kudasai!” is “Please do your best!”

I have to say that I really like this usage. It says so much that is very important, I think. It is especially important for the work of reclaiming our Hestia as an important and even sacred space. I am not sure about anyone else, but I know that I have compared myself to others and felt that I am not good enough or organized enough to undertake such a journey. I was certainly not able to do much around the house when I had a demanding career outside the home. I was (and still am) in awe of women that are able to raise children, have a job outside the house, and still maintain a semblance of order in their home. There is a lot of pressure on women to be able to do it all, and do it all well, in the present day and age.

As you can see from previous articles, even now that I am winding down my previous career and even without children, I am having trouble with juggling my projects and endeavors. The phrase and the concept behind the phrase, “Ganbatte kudasai,” is really quite helpful.

This concept is important because it helps me remember that the important thing is doing my best. I am sure that I am not alone in worrying whether my best will be “good enough.” There are so many expectations placed on us, both by our world and by ourselves. It is easy to say, “Oh, this is impossible. I will never be good enough, so why bother.” The concept of ganbaru is so helpful with this. The important thing is not the result; the important thing is that I am doing my best!

This may seem quite strange for us, but I am learning that in Japanese culture, ganburu is actually an abstract concept, which is not related to any particular activity. I think, though, that there was a time when this was understood even in the West. I remember as a child, we would get separate grades for effort. I do not know if this is still the case, but I do know that I have heard that scoffed at, with the idea that it is achievement, not effort, that is what is important.

Yet, I think that there really is a value to effort and to doing our best, regardless of result! I am thinking of my days in school…at every level from elementary to graduate studies. There was something satisfying about doing my best in a class that was very difficult for me, and that getting a B (or even lower grade) in a difficult class was much more satisfying to me than getting even the top grade in a class that was easy. Indeed, it sometimes felt embarrassing to get a good grade in a class that I had not worked very hard at.

I have gone on a little bit of a tangent here, but I think that this concept and idea really is important. The idea of this blog is not to make anyone feel guilty or ashamed or that they are “less than.” Our society has a funny attitude around the home. It is considered shameful if our homes are not in order; however, efforts to maintain our homes are not valued. I wish I had a nickel for every time someone asked me, “So, what are you going to do all day?” when I have talked about closing my business. Some are satisfied when I talk about starting an astrology practice, but when I say that I am going to be a housewife, the looks are quite dismissive. It is almost like people think that houses maintain themselves by magic, or something. It really is a lot of work!

So, in the face of all of that, I think remembering the concept of ganbaru is so important. It is not expected that anyone is perfect, just that she is doing her best!

So, to all my readers….”Ganbatte kudasai!”

And for myself, “Ganbarimasu!” (“I will do my best.”)

Developing a Routine

On November 4, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary3 Comments

As I am settling into being primarily responsible for taking care of the house, and all of the tasks and chores that go with it, I am finding time management a bit of an issue. I am also working on developing an astrology practice, continuing my astrological and metaphysical studies, learning Japanese, and blogging. Additionally, I want to be available to visit and spend time with my grandmother, who lives upstairs from me and to maintain social relationships. There are also several projects I would like to complete, such as cleaning out the closet and the back porch and writing an astrology book. Oh yes, I am also working on handmade gifts, and I would eventually like to learn how to sew. Whew! Strangely enough, I am finding I have less time now that I have closed my previous business, not more!

To Do List I wrote a previous article about my time management woes, and I think that part of the difficulty is developing a new routine. Routines are quite helpful, at least for me. The reason for this is that it cuts down on the amount of decisions one needs to make. I know that there have been times that I have wandered about the house from room to room just trying to decide what to do next!

When I was working outside the home, I used time management software to keep me on track. It finally dawned on me that I can use that same time management software with all of my current chores, tasks, projects, and plans. I have always liked Microsoft Outlook. I have tried other programs, but that is really the one that works best for me. One of the reasons I like it is that I can set up the visual interface Outlook Today to only show me the tasks for each day at a time! I can also set up tasks on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis, and it will pop up on that schedule. This means that when I open up Outlook each day, my tasklist is all ready for me, without me having to think about it each day. I also feel a sense of accomplishment every time I check off a task on the list!

I am also learning to feel comfortable with doing a little at a time. There are some really big tasks like the project of cleaning out the closet and the back porch which seem daunting and overwhelming. I am trying to work on them a little at a time each day.

I do not know that I am actually accomplishing more, but I may be. Developing a routine is helping me feel a bit less overwhelmed and minimizing the amount of time I spend wandering through the house trying to figure out what I am doing!

Recipe: Sweet and Sour Meatballs

On October 14, 2013May 8, 2018 By Tea Sugar SaltIn Cooking, Guest Articles, Recipes2 Comments

Cure Ocha here with a recipe!

So the wonderful co-op had its one year anniversary party with potluck, and I brought a special recipe: sweet and sour meatballs. This recipe has been in my family for half a century and comes out of a 1950s magazine – I love clever 1950s recipes like this.

Sweet and Sour Meatballs for a Party

The meatballs can be whatever meatball recipe you like best, or even storebought, but this is what I used. They’re a little tender and have to be handled gently when made this way, but pretty much anyone who eats meat can eat them safely.

1 cup dry short or medium grain rice
2 cups water
4 lbs ground beef
Italian seasoning (or thyme, oregano, basil and parsley) to taste
Garlic salt (or garlic and salt) to taste

Preheat the oven to 400F. Cook the rice with the water in your usual way. The reason you don’t want long grain rice is because you want the rice to be sticky so that it will bind your meat together. Cool the rice down (I spread it out on a cookie sheet and fanned it with my bamboo spatula) until it’s only warm, then mix it thoroughly with the ground beef and seasonings. Take a small bit and cook it in a pan in order to taste it and make sure the seasonings are right. When it’s yummy, roll the meat mixture into 1 inch balls and place them touching but not smooshed onto a cookie sheet – you should get a little more than sixty from this amount of meat. Bake them in the oven, checking frequently after the first ten minutes, until one from the middle is cooked through when you break it open.

Now that you have meatballs, it’s time for the sauce. Are you ready? This is absurdly easy.

30 oz of cocktail sauce
30 oz of grape jelly

Mix them in a large pot (or crockpot) over low heat. Add the meatballs and stir to coat. Simmer at least 10 minutes and then keep them warm until it’s time to eat.

These travel well in a crockpot and stay safe during potlucks if you just plug the crockpot in and keep it on warm when you get there. If you have a little more or a little less of the sauce it doesn’t matter…it’s a flexible recipe.

Please enjoy!

I Feel Pretty: Clothing and Manners

On September 25, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary5 Comments

I have been rather fascinated by Lolita. I do not have the money or the figure to buy the wonderful clothing out there. My figure is not such that I would look good in a Lolita silhouette either. I guess the style that I have been working towards is as close to otome as I can put together with clothing from the plus size resale store by my house.

Still, I just love to look at pictures of girls dressed in Lolita, and I do dream of someday having the money and figure for such a style.

Anyways, I recently read discussions regarding whether one needed to or even should adopt ladylike manners when dressing in Lolita. One of the ideas was along the lines of whether it was phony when people acted differently when wearing Lolita.

Of course, I have never been a part of any Lolita community, so I do not really know much. On the other hand, I am thinking of myself. One of the things I realized is that I feel differently when I dress nicely. When I am wearing pretty dresses, I feel pretty. When I feel pretty, I naturally start behaving in a more ladylike fashion.

Now, I think I have rather good manners to begin with, although, I am far from perfect. When I dress nicely, with a pretty dress and gloves, I find myself being more polite and gracious than I would ordinarily be. I do not think it is putting on an act. I think that the clothing we wear does transform us, if we let it.

I know that it works the other way too. When I used to dress sloppily on occasion, I would feel rather sloppy, and my manners would often become sloppy to match. It was not a conscious thing. It just happened naturally.

I do not know if this happens just with clothing. Once I had some family and friends over for breakfast. I did not have a fancy meal, but I put out a pretty tablecloth and served breakfast on nice china. The strangest thing happened. Everyone naturally started being on their best behavior, and their manners improved a hundredfold. Even my cat behaved better. I have been working with my cat on not begging at the table (with limited success). Yet, when we were all at the table, she sat nicely and waited for us all to be finished. Of course, I gave her a nice treat and praised her for that.

Anyways, I do not know that I am saying anything profound or wise, but it was something I thought of that may be of interest.

What Is “Real”? What is Ideal?

On September 21, 2013May 11, 2018 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Ponderings and Reflections17 Comments

There was an interesting discussion after a previous article, Welcome Back, Sandra Dee, regarding actresses, the roles they play, and who are they in “real life.” There was mention of how who we are is often shaped by social expectations, and even a bit of philosophical discussion regarding our lives being an illusion and a play.

As interesting as this discussion is, and I hope it continues, I think that in many ways the images are more important than the “reality,” or at least the “reality” in the sense of our physical existence. I understand that this is contrary to the view of modern society. We are fascinated by the “real lives” of celebrities, which generally consists of prying into the darkest and dirtiest parts of their lives. We are particularly fascinated when the “real lives” of actresses, or other celebrities do not match the characters they play or the images they present.

I think that this fascination is a bit misguided, though, and I also think it is not really useful for those of us trying to clean and purify our Image Spheres for various reasons.

One of the reasons is that people are complicated. We all play many different roles in our lives. We play roles as parents, as students, as workers, as friends, and the list goes on and on. Which one of these roles are “real”? I think the answer to that is that they are all “real,” even though they are likely quite different.

People are also complicated in that we all have a True Self and a False Self. On a basic level, our True Self is our better self, and our False Self is who we are when we succumb to temptation. Using a popular media image, our True Self is the little angel on our shoulder, and our False Self is the little devil. This idea is a bit foreign to modern, cynical thinking, which seems to operating under the belief that we are being “real” when we are at our worst. Actually, it is interesting that there are currently many “reality shows” being produced that create artificial situations that often have the effect of bringing out the worst in people.

Aside from the complicated nature of people, when we are working to purify our Image Sphere, we are making choices as to what we are exposing ourselves to. In our day to day interactions in the physical world, there are many situations that we do not have control over. We can not always avoid ugly or poisonous things. We are not always capable of creating a living environment that nurtures our soul.

Given that there are many things we do not have control over, when we do have control over our Image Sphere, it makes a lot of sense to choose good and healthy images. Do these images represent the “reality” of the past or of another culture? Some of the answer to that question depends on what one defines as “reality,” of course. To avoid that difficulty, I think an easier question would be whether the images accurately depict the physical circumstances of the past or another culture. If one phrases it that way, the answer is likely that it does in some ways, and it does not in others.

On the other hand, when we get too much caught up in that analysis, I think we lose sight of what we are trying to do. I think that the media we create and consume reflects our values and our ideals. These are the stories we are choosing to tell and to listen to.

While the stories that we tell and hear may on some level reflect the physical, material circumstances that we find ourselves in, they also help shape and define our circumstances. If we are trying to make changes in our lives to let our True Selves or our best selves shine forth, we need role models and examples. I see nothing wrong with these role models being fictional characters. I also see nothing wrong in allowing the actresses who bring these fictional characters to life being role models as well.

I think that this was understood in the past. The images of actresses and movie stars were carefully preserved to hide their faults and their struggles. Nowadays, there seems to be a great deal of effort spent on exposing the carefully hidden faults and struggles of the role models of the past and celebrating the bad behavior and faults of those who would be the role models of the present. Much of the time, this is done in the name of “exposing the truth.”

Yet, is this really “exposing the truth,” or is it creating an illusion of an ugly and cynical world? If our role models are celebrated for behaving badly, and if we are taught that this is “reality,” how will we ever aspire to, well, anything?

A metaphor to this might be a beautiful ceramic vase that has a flaw in it. Does it make sense to turn the vase so that the flaw is visible and draw a black marker around the flaw to make the flaw more obvious? Wouldn’t it make more sense to position the vase so the flaw can not be seen?

I think that all of us are beautiful vases with flaws, including celebrities. The choice that we have is whether to highlight our beauty or highlight our flaws. It seems an easy choice when looked at in this light, I think.

Welcome Back, Sandra Dee!

On September 18, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary, Ponderings and Reflections10 Comments

As part of the changes I have been making lately, I have been doing my best to avoid most Western post-Eclipse media (media produced after the mid 60’s). I admit, though, I slipped a bit this evening. I watched a movie from my childhood, Grease. When I was a child, this was one of the most popular movies around. Children would brag to each other about the number of times they had seen this movie. The soundtrack for Grease was one of the first albums that I had. I listened to this album over and over again, and I can still sing “Hopeless Devoted to You” from memory. Given this, when Grease was on the television, I found myself watching it.

Hopelessly Devoted to You I am actually glad that I watched this movie, and I watched it in a much different way this time. Watching this movie was quite instructive for me in understanding how the Image Sphere of my generation was shaped. In remembering my own reaction to this movie, this shaping is not just theoretical, it was personal.

The movie came out in 1978, but it was set in the 1950’s. The main female character in this movie was Sandy Olsson. At the beginning of the movie, Sandy was innocent and pure. During the previous summer, she fell in love with a boy, Danny Zuko, who was part of the clique, “the greasers,” who were the “bad boys” of the school. The central plot of the movie was relationship and romance between these two characters, but I think that there was a theme to this movie that was quite insidious. At least it was insidious for me, particularly because I identified strongly with Sandy.

Throughout this movie, Sandy was ridiculed and teased for her innocence and purity. She had just transferred to the High School from Australia, and she was befriended by Frenchie, one of the “Pink Ladies,” who were the “bad girls” of the school. One of the early scenes is a sleepover that Sandy attended with the Pink Ladies. One of the songs of this theme was “Look at Me, I’m Sandra Dee.” During this song, the other girls mocked Sandy because she did not drink, smoke, or swear, and because she was too innocent.

There were also several scenes where Danny rejected and even mocked Sandy as well in order to maintain his reputation with his friends. The two do eventually get together, and Danny does try to make changes. He joins the track team and earns a Letterman sweater.

Sadly, though, Danny’s changes were not the focus of the movie. The focus of the movie was the pressure upon Sandy to renounce her innocence and her purity. Eventually, she did. When she did, she became fully part of the group of girls, and she and Danny came together. The moral of this story seemed to be that if a girl wants to be happy and have friends, she must give up being innocent and pure.

I remember as a young girl, along with “Hopelessly Devoted to You,” I also sang over and over again the song in which Sandy makes the decision to renounce her innocence, the reprise of the mocking song, “Look at Me, I’m Sandra Dee”:

Goodbye Sandra Dee Look at me,
There has to be something more than what they see
Wholesome and pure,
Oh so scared and unsure, a poor man’s Sandra Dee

Frenchie: They won [a drag race]. Isn’t that great? Aren’t you happy?

Sandy: Not really, Frenchie, but I think I know a way that I could be. Could you help me? Can I come to your place?

Frenchie: Sure, come on.

Sandy, you must start anew
Don’t you know, what you must do
Hold your head high, take a deep breath and sigh
Goodbye to Sandra Dee

The help that Sandy asks for from Frenchie is a makeover. She changes from her pretty, wholesome look to one that was decidedly unwholesome. It was then that there was a happy ending.

The message of this movie was clear to me as a young girl. One could not be innocent and wholesome and be happy. In order to be happy and accepted by her peers, a girl needed to say “goodbye to Sandra Dee.”

I am an adult now, and I have learned a lot. One of the things that I have learned is that there have been many changes in our world starting in the mid-1960’s, and one of the things that happened was a process of Conscience Inversion, a process by which we are taught to be proud of our worst instincts and ashamed of our best ones. This is one of the forces that shaped a larger change in society marked by atomization, deracination, and deformation.

So, as part of my journey, I am reclaiming Sandra Dee. Rather than being embarrassed and ashamed of being wholesome, I am reclaiming and celebrating it. A lot of things have happened in my life, but I believe that I can reclaim my innocence. I also believe that reclaiming our personal innocence is one of the best things that we can do, not just for ourselves but for our world.

So Welcome Back, Sandra Dee!

Where Did the Time Go?

On September 10, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary

Where did the time go? I think I say that every day. I usually say that about 3 or 4 in the afternoon, when I have not gotten to even half of what I had planned for the day.

One may think that one of the authors of a weblog of this nature would have a perfectly clean home, with dinner on the table right on time, and with all my tasks completed at the end of the day. The expectation may be even greater in that I do not have children, but only three cats. Surely, I could keep up with everything.

Sadly, that is not the case. Right now, I am contending with a dish monster because I did not do them last night. I had to quickly iron a shirt for my spouse, because she needs at least one to wear for work tomorrow. I had to leave the rest of the shirts for tomorrow. I did the laundry last Saturday, and it is almost Wednesday, and I am just now getting to the ironing. Oh yes, some of the shirts are left from last week. I still have a closet and a back porch filled with boxes of stuff that has not been unpacked since about 2 years ago, when we moved into this house.

Aside from that, I am struggling to make myself finish with the business I am trying to close. At some point, I do think I need to get serious about getting my astrology practice off of the ground. Oh dear, I should probably do the charts that I have promised friends and family first.

Oh yes, I did want to learn Japanese. I started a while back, and I have a book to learn hiragana, but I have not touched it in a couple of months. I also have Dr. Lee Lehman’s Medical Astrology book I have been working my way though, but I have been working through it for months. I also want to read Ptolemy and Aristotle. I am also trying to work my way through Little Women. Oh yes, as I mentioned in my last post, I want to get started on my holiday gift making. I have gotten one and a half fingers done since my last post.

There is a quote from the Christian written tradition, “The Spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Sadly, that applies to me right now.

If I were a more practical person, I would probably read books about time management. I have read those books in the past. I have also received some wise guidance from a wonderful mentor. The reality is that I am not a very practical person. I would love to be, but I really am not.

I might not be all that practical, but I do have some knowledge that can help me. Given that my trouble seems to be time, I know that time is governed by the Great Angel, Sai Rhavë. Sai Rhavë’s planet is Saturn. It just so happened that I just went through a Saturn opposition and Saturn has just crossed my Ascendant, moving from my 12th House to my 1st House.

What all of this means, for those who do not know astrology, who are probably most of the readers of this blog, is that I have been and am still facing the lessons of Sai Rhavë right now. Astrologers generally consider Saturn a malefic, and so she is, at least on the physical level. Despite this, I have learned over the years, that while Sai Rhavë can be a rather harsh and severe taskmistress, she can also reward those who learn and practice her lessons.

One of these lessons is that of humility. I need to accept I can only do so much, and that it may take me time to learn to manage the new routine. The routine of a housewife is much different than the routine of the workplace. One generally does not have specific deadlines or anyone giving any guidance as to what should be done when. Sometimes just making a decision where to start can be a challenge. I am physically out of shape, and I am not one with a lot of physical energy in general. My knees can often only handle so much. I am also not a very organized person in general. I don’t know how many times I have come up with systems like task lists, only to spend more time on the system than I do on doing the tasks.

Another lesson is that of patience. Things are going to take as long as they take. When I started this, I had illusions that in the first month I would have the house completely organized, have my old business finished, and have my new business at least off of the ground. I guess that was a bit unrealistic. Sometimes, I feel like I am not making any progress at all. I think one of the tricks to patience is to be happy with small victories. One of the small victories I am having is learning to cook. I am slowly adding new things to my repertoire. My latest is meatloaf. I was rather proud of myself yesterday when I managed to have the meatloaf and all of the sides ready at about the same time, and I managed to get everything on the table without a major panic. It is a small victory, but one must take the victories she can get. I have also managed to write fairly regularly for this blog and the others I write for. I think I can take that as another victory.

One of the most important lesson of Sai Rhavë, though, is the lesson of persistence. I need to just keep going, a little at a time, without giving up or getting discouraged. That can be the hardest lesson of all. I am fortunate in that my spouse has been mostly patient with me as I am fumbling through the changes. She tells me dinner is good, and she is generally supportive of my efforts. Money is a bit of a worry, but I think that money is always a worry. I just need to keep plugging away a little at a time and trust and have faith. I have to do my best, and hope that my best is enough.

Thank you for reading through my worries and woes. I hope you are all not completely disillusioned by these confessions.

It’s that Time Again: The Annual Yarncrafting Marathon

On September 6, 2013 By Cynthia ThinnesIn Diary, Knitting/Crocheting4 Comments

Oh dear. It is that time again. It is September, and Labor Day has just come and gone. It just occurred to me, that despite my resolutions and best intentions, I have not started one Nativity present yet. It looks like my annual knitting and crocheting marathon is about to begin.

SAMSUNG — Made by my aunt and given to me when I was a toddler

As I am gearing myself mentally for the challenge and task of deciding on handmade gifts for friends and family, I started thinking about yarncrafting. About 5 years ago, for some strange reason, I had the urge to relearn crochet. I say relearn, because I actually had learned to crochet, at least a little, when I was about 9 years old. I did not do much, mostly blankets for my Breyer Horses. I do not think I learned more than single crochet, and I could never manage to crochet straight rows. Now that I have learned again, I realize that I did not put in the chain stitch at the end of each row, but I did not know that then.

As a child, I was always fascinated by handmade things. I still have handmade pictures of a cat and a dog that an aunt of mine made for me when I was a very little girl. I remember seeing them and just being in awe of her that she made them!

On the other side of my family, there is a long history and tradition of making things by hand. My grandmother’s house is filled with handmade pictures, tablecloths, and afghans that have been made by her sisters and her mother. She used to sew all of her children’s clothing before it got to be more expensive to make clothes than to buy them at the store. When I learned to crochet and then to knit, she was very proud of me. She was more proud of me for learning to knit and crochet than she was when I graduated summa cum laude. At the time, I was amused by this, but now, I think I understand. If I look back, I think that learning to crochet was the very beginning of the journey that I am on now.

I think that this was made by either my great aunt or great grandmother.

One of the best rewards for learning to crochet, and then a year later, learning to knit, was that I started to hear new stories from my grandmother. I heard about how her mother would make all of the clothing for her, her two sisters and her two brother. I heard how her mother had to knit socks for her father, and when his socks started to get holes, she would unravel the foot part, reuse the cuff, and re-knit the foot part. I heard about how her mother bought a dress that fit her perfectly from the store, and how when it was worn out, her mother made a pattern out of it, and made all her future dresses to that pattern. My grandmother was the youngest of the girls in her family, and I heard about how her mother would take the material from the clothes from the older girls and remake them for her, so she did not feel like she was getting hand-me-downs. I heard about how carefully her mother would mend all of their clothing from the inside, so that no one could tell that the clothes had been mended. Contrast that to blue jeans that are purposely made with holes in them!

Ulla Doll — Made by my grandmother. She used to have a yellow apron, but sadly, her apron got lost over the years.

I even heard stories about my grandmother’s grandmother, who would make linen from plants. I guess that the plants were carefully dried on the porch, and then later spun into yarn. I am just amazed at how hard our foremothers used to work for the basic necessities of life. Someday, I do want to learn how to spin, but maybe not just yet.

Speaking of my grandmother, I just remembered her birthday is coming up soon. She has begun to expect handmade socks as presents from me, and is almost disappointed if I give her anything else. I really do need to get moving on things, don’t I? Lots to do! Lots to do! I really am not sure what happened this summer.

Then there is always the dilemma, do you make one thing at a time, or have several projects going at once? I am not sure which is faster, but I do know that when it gets late in the yarncrafting marathon season….late November and December, I often move from leisurely working on many different projects as I feel like it to hurriedly making one thing at a time, based on time it takes to ship things and the like.

Despite the time crunch, I do think I will finish the autumn lace gloves I am making myself before I begin the holiday rush! I have one glove finished, and I just need to finish the fingers on the second one. They should not take too much time to finish, so long as I work on them in earnest.

I guess I should stop writing and get back to my knitting!

Good luck and ganbatte kudasai* to any other yarncrafters starting their holiday projects!

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*Ganbatte kudasai is a Japanese phrase. The literal translation is “please, do your best.” This phrase is used in the same context as the American phrase “good luck.”

Mormor's Backporch

Category: Diary